Thursday, June 23, 2011


Where have we been? Yes, I realize that much time has gone by since I posted. Summer is here! But I haven't had the chance to really feel like it is yet!
A little over a week ago we got back from our mission trip to the Dominican Republic. This was a 9 day trip that was so eye-opening and heart changing. What I saw, experienced and felt during those days is definitely something that I will carry with me all my life. It was such an amazing trip. It was also the first time I left Oliver anywhere overnight, and he stayed with his grandparents during the nine days. I was so nervous about this, but once we were there, I found that I was so busy I didn't have much time to be sad. I missed him terribly, but the time with Jonah and the time serving definitely helped. I know that the Lord provided the grace and strength to help me with that. That small detail that I dreaded, the thought of leaving our son behind, was on my mind and heart for weeks, months even, leading up to our departure.
Now here I am on the other side of it all, with our son back at home, our life back to 'normal' and I'm so grateful I was able to go. Would I go again? I think it is always hard to say 'yes' for all those fears and naggings about letting go of what's comfortable and 'safe'. But I NEED to go again. That's my answer.
I can't believe what I saw. What I learned. What I learned about God, about others, about Jonah.
It was awesome indeed.
Now here we are back in our home, back at my job, and back to life in the states.
Our lives are anything but 'normal' lately though.
I am about to end my job of 3 years, to start my other job- staying at home with our dear boy. This decision is on of faith. Much faith and prayer. I am so excited to start this role, as it's been my hearts desires for years. I am also excited to see how God will provide for us, as I know He will. Where He guides He provides!
It's been an incredible year. So much has changed in our lives this year, in comparison to last year.
Starting with our change in churches, our change of heart, spiritually, at the start of the year, our focus on serving, missions, using our talents for Christ, our renewed passion in photography, our faith based decisions, and our unity in all of this.
It's been a GOOD year. It's been a growing year, and I'm so thankful for that. I can see how God is shaping and directing us, and my only concern is that I continue to allow Him to do this. That I don't again become self-centered, and too scared to step out and trust Him. There is freedom in faith that is unlike anything else I've ever known. And in the worlds's eyes this is hard to understand. But truly it is so liberating.
Let go and just let Him lead!

Saturday, June 4, 2011

One year

Okay here we are, two days out until we head off to the Domincan Republic.
I can't believe it's here already.
This past week flew by. We celebrated our sweet little boy's first birthday. One years old. Really? Where did the last year go!!
I can still remember those first few days of just taking in the sight, smell and sound of him. Us, parents. It was hard to believe, as it seemed to happen so quickly. You go from not knowing what to expect with a newborn, to REALLY not knowing what you are doing as a parent, to wondering what you did before he was ever in your life.
Oh we still have so many moments of 'figuring' things out, praying our way, asking for wisdom from God over and over, and learning that no our kid is not like every single other baby out there, when it comes to some stuff. No, we have so much to learn, and certainly have not arrived. But, we did it. We got through our first year, and you know what? We did okay.
Yes, God is so good to supply us with the knowledge and wisdom along the way, the patience and love, the endurance, the ability to function on little sleep, the quick mind to make split decisions, the strength to stand up and say no when needed, the determination to stand for our choices in matters, the tenderness only a parents heart holds, eyes to take in each moment, and an open heart- continually being filled up with love for this treasure.
What a gift it is to be a parent. I love being a mommy, I love being a parent along with Jonah, to Oliver. He  has tapped a place in my heart that I never knew existed. It makes me mindful again and again of what God must feel for us. Even though the scope of what we feel is much smaller, that makes it even more wonderfully overwhelming to think of how much God loves us, and how much He treasures us.
Yes we've learned a lot this year. We did things we never thought we'd be doing, or saying (our conversations sure did pick up some interesting things this year!) things we never thought we'd be discussing so often and so openly- that having a baby brings into your life.
It's been a whirlwind of a year, and I've loved every moment.
Now as we look ahead to year two, I'm eager and ready for it. This parenting thing is...dare I say... fun!
Every day there are new expressions, new sounds, new things to learn. It's like opening a gift everytime we get rewarded with a smile or a laugh. How good it is for the soul- this I never expected. A child gives so much without a clue they are giving.
Thank you Lord for this sweet little boy that has filled us up! I think I've grown just by watching this little boy grow, by watching my husband grow as a father and I'm thankful.
I am about to embark on a 'new' role as I leave my job out in the work world and embrace the role God has given to me- my hearts desire, to stay at home with Oliver.
This decision has been one I prayed for. We prayed for over and over and God said that now it's time.
This I am sure of. I have so much peace, and Jonah has lead the way. We sought God for an answer and He met us. How thankful I am for my God that speaks and leads. (You can read more about it here:
And so I will be a mom, I will be a wife, I'll be a home maker. And you know what? To me there isn't anything greater than this, to train up our child, to run our home, to be available as a wife, mom and friend. I'm excited for the opportunity to minister to others, but mostly to be the woman that God has called me to be. I almost want to jump up and down when I think about it all, I have that bubbly excitement in me that knows the peace and joy that come with following God in a decision.
For now though, I'm looking ahead at the upcoming mission trip. With this also come a goodbye for 9 days to our sweet boy. Am I gonna have a hard time? It's funny because soooo many people keep telling me exactly this- how much I'll miss Oliver, how hard it will be, how rough it will be. And I keep thinking, "really? way to be encouraging people..."
And I'm not being naive. I know it will be tough, I'll miss that little boy. But this decision too was made in faith that this is what God called me to do. I needed to say yes. So I did. And we'll be off on Monday to the DR. And we'll be thinking of that little boy back home with our family, but we'll know he's loved and cared for. And I'm eager and ready to get on that plane, not because of my own doing, no, the fearful Carrie says, " no! stay home, stay with Oliver, don't step out of your safe little home!" but my heart that wants to serve Jesus first says, "go". And that's the part that anxiously can't wait to get there, to see what God has for us, what He wants to show us, teach us. And I'm ready for that.
So for now, farewell, until we are back. What an update that is sure to be.